Fear of the Opposite Sex

It may be natural in elementary school for girls and boys to believe the other had cooties. There was a natural fear of being too closely associated with someone of the opposite sex. When that fear follows you into adulthood it is known as Sexophobia.

As children, boys enjoy activities that do not generally appeal to girls. Girls play with dolls and boys often think that’s for sissies. Girls often wear their hair longer and wear clothes boys do not wear. Even in our earliest years there are many reasons to consider a person of the opposite sex fearful. Each sex is built differently and have different hormones sending unique signals to their bodies. However, it is that combination of unique traits that generally cause boys and girls to eventually find the other attractive.

What Causes Sexophobia?

Often this fear is due to a conversation a child may have with a parent that causes the child to believe that an individual of the opposite sex is dangerous. This may be due to the fact that some parents have a difficult time knowing how to explain the wonderful feelings young people have when they finally discover the opposite sex.

Because these conversations come up a child may indeed believe that any close association with someone of the opposite sex could hurt them in some way. They may believe their parents and close family can be trusted, but other members of the opposite sex are simply trying to hurt them.

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Others may fear the personal vulnerability associated with approaching someone of the opposite sex romantically. This may, however, be due more to the fear of rejection or ridicule.

Symptoms of Sexophobia

An individual with this fear may be profoundly uncomfortable in any gathering that includes members of the opposite sex. They may not feel themselves trustworthy and they certainly don’t consider the opposite sex worthy of trust.

Other symptoms may include…

• Sweating
• Air hunger
• Dry mouth
• Trembling
• Crying
• A sense of control loss
• Dizziness

Even when an individual finds someone of the opposite sex attractive they may simply consider that attraction to be part of their inherent danger.

How to Overcome Sexophobia

Learning more about the unique nature of the two sexes can help you understand that while different the opposite sex is very compatible as well.

In many cases the use of therapy can help uncover the truth about your fear. It is possible molestation could be the cause of your fear, but it could easily be the misunderstanding of parent/child dialogue.

You may feel you have the potential for control loss when you are around a person of the opposite sex. Even in this case a therapist can help you learn social skills while overcoming the fears you may have had for many years.

Sometimes it may seem like it would be easier to simply leave a fear alone. but by making no decision to get help you may actually be making a decision to live in long-term fear.

The fear of the opposite sex is also referred to as:

• Opposite sex fear
• Sexophobia